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Day 2: Where I'd like to be in 10 years.

Jul. 18th, 2014 | 01:39 pm

I'm fine where I am. I hope that down the line, I will be able to fix up the house and make repairs to it so that it becomes a little more up to date. The house is from 1778 and it has a lot of problems, but it is cute and cozy and we like living here. It also has a nice big plot of land connected to it and cows just behind it, so it's really nice, but there are problems. For instance, it has no foundation and it stands directly on the damp earth beneath it which causes moisture problems and brings ants and mice. Would be nice to maybe fix that sometime, but the money's not really there for that right now.

Otherwise, I want science to have discovered a cure for multiple sclerosis so I can be free of that, but it doesn't look like that is realistic, so I will just make the best of what I already have which is a drug that saves off new attacks and makes it so the mental and physical deterioration is slower than it would otherwise be.

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30 day blog challenge

Jul. 17th, 2014 | 06:25 pm

Hmm, sounds interesting. Will try to answer all of these even if I don't think I really can with all of them.

Day 1: Current relationship

My current relationship is also my only relationship ever. I was a late bloomer so to speak and didn't really get into that man/woman thing until I was past my golden youth... I had better things to do with my life than run around on dates and hooking up like many of my peers were doing.
We have been together for 10 years and married for 5. We have a small son together who is 21 months old.
We met when I went abroad to study for my Master's and my husband happened to have just moved back to the city in which I went to school and as fate would have it we met on the first or second day I was even there. I don't remember which it was, but I do remember that I instantly liked him a lot and thought he was pretty great. Turns out he liked me, too, but it took a while for him to give in and let logic fly. He told me many times that he would date me if I didn't have to return to my home country after such a short time and that the only reason he hadn't already asked me out was the thought that we would have to end it too soon. I did not accept that and I did not accept him dating another girl and here we are 10 years later, married, house and a small child later :-) The first 5 years of our relationship was long distance. I lived in Europe and he lived in America and we saw each other twice a year when we could and otherwise were forced to use the slow and unstable internet of the early 2000s to communicate. I finished my degrees, got a good and rewarding job as a teacher and he got a culinary degree and worked for several restaurants and cafees before we were finally able to make the big move and get him over here. Since then it's been eventful and there have been some stumbling blocks along the way, just like in all relationships, but we are good at making the best of things together and we love each other very much.
Our current stumbling block is that he has a new job whose hours are made of suck. We hardly see each other and I am stuck tending the house and garden and take care of our son while our daycare is closed for summer vacation. It's exhausting and our son is running me ragged! My mom's advice is to just relax and enjoy the time with the child, but that is impossible when he leaves me no time to get anything resembling housework done and the cobwebs are beginning to look like they might be permanent inventory... I do love being with my son, he is great fun and he makes me laugh and smile and love so much that I sometimes think my heart will explode.

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Current frustration

Feb. 17th, 2014 | 09:37 am

I have a certain amount of frustration in my life, but none quite so frustrating as people who find joy and glee in picking small fights about random things they don't understand. Case in point: my coworker who likes to point out the minor fallacies in my statements.

This morning I made my husband a lovely birthday breakfast of vegan biscuits and gravy and was trying to explain the concept of the dish to her (Danish and has no idea of most things American) and she was quick to point out that I couldn't have used meat since we are vegetarians and that, btw, the dish sounded disgusting. It ticks me off that she has to pick whatever I say apart. Of course, I didn't use meat, but TVP. Of course, I didn't use milk as I am lactose intolerant bordering on allergic. However, that doesn't change the fact that the dish was Biscuits and Gravy - just vegan instead of animal product based.

To praise myself: it was terrific and the biscuits rose beautifully and were crumbly like the real thing. I felt quite proud of myself :-D Plus, hubby enjoyed it.

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Dec. 28th, 2013 | 12:33 pm

Today I have done something that benefits no one but me and it is making me feel incredibly uncomfortable mentally.
I have spent a small fortune to get my hair styled and colored and it is something I never do because I feel like I am wasting money that we need for other purposes.
Besides that I can tell my social phobia is definitely acting up sitting in the salon with all these people and the hairdresser trying to get small talk going... I never know what to say and am always worried that what I end up saying is embarrassing.
It's not easy being me sometimes.

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Disease update and general life news

Oct. 15th, 2013 | 09:25 pm

So at my last checkup the specialist told me that if I have another 2-3 years of low activity in the areas affected by the MS, they will take me off the medicine and declare me in complete remission. This is now my new hope. I have had 2 years of no new attacks or anything. It's great!

My son turned 1 the other day and has grown wonderfully. He is now standing and walking around the room using the chairs and shelves, but if I try to coax him into walking by my hands he promptly sits down and pouts. I wonder when he will reach the stage where he believes he can walk enough to actually let go of the chair...We had a small birthday party for him with cake and hot chocolate with whipped cream and at his daycare they had chocolate muffin that we baked for them. It was really nice.

Right now Adam and I are making granola. It's hilarious because people always call us hippies for some reason and now we're totally living up to that one stereotype of the granola munching hippie... Oh well, can't win them all.. We grow our own vegetables, are thrifty with our funds, care about the environment, bake much of our own bread, buy organic wherever possible, are vegetarians, spend time with our families and friends without technology and we ride our bikes  16 miles a day to work and back. And now we're making friggin' granola. In fact, Adam just opened a bag of organic dark roast coffee :-) H is drinking a bottle of his organic formula and wearing an organic onesie for bed. If that makes us hippies, well, then, whoopdehoop.

My eyesight is deteriorating pretty fast these days. I hate it. I wear contacts every day and now I have to add reading glasses, too, for whenever I am on the computer or reading a book/paper/anything, really. This getting older thing is not my friend.

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Another year

Jun. 27th, 2013 | 09:12 pm

I have just returned from
this year's graduation ceremony and it feels so sad to say goodbye to my students who I have gotten to know so well over the past 3 years and who I will miss a great deal in the months to come.


It was a nice ceremony with speeches and champagne. 4 of my students were awarded scholarships and 3 were given diplomas for extra credit. I am very proud of them all :-)


This was my 7th ceremony. I am realising that I am getting really old and that I have been a teacher for a long time. It is a fairly odd thing to suddenly realize, but the students who graduated today are 14 years younger than me and could theoretically be my children. That is also a strange feeling. Especially when my actual child is only 8 months old now...

One of my students gave me a bag of saffron that he had bought for me in Turkey :-) I will never have to buy saffron again.

Another student gave me a rose for having been a great teacher. That made me cry a little. So sweet.

I have actually only ever been given presents by one student ever before and that was a beautiful rose the first year I taught. It's always a special gift for a teacher when it comes from a student :-)

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Jun. 15th, 2013 | 05:37 pm

I just got a call from my mother telling me that my grandfather of 85 tried to commit suicide this morning by driving in front of a moving train.


He was unsuccessful because the train operator managed to stop the train and not hit him.


My mom and her sisters have made a plan to stay with him at all times of the day until they can get him to his doctor Monday morning. He has already seen a psychiatrist today and has been evaluated by him plus he's been examined by several doctors to see if something wrong other than his wanting to die. They found nothing physically wrong, but the psychiatrist advised him to check himself in to a clinic. This will not happen. He's stubborn as an old bull.


The weird thing is that last night I dreamt about him and we were having this lovely conversation about life and death and I remember saying to him in the dream that I was so happy for him to be joining his brothers so soon. I remember that part of the dream most vividly because we talked about each brother by name and talked about when they each died and how he had missed them.


My family is doing ok, but certain parts of it are behaving absolutely shamefully in that they sold him instead of being supportive and trying to help him find peace when he obviously needs it the most.

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We sold it.

Jun. 11th, 2013 | 07:54 pm

It's over. We have sold the damned garden! We didn't get quite what we wanted, but sold it is and that means we're done with it for bloody good.

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In other news...

Jun. 3rd, 2013 | 02:25 pm

Back on the drug again and it's working great! I use the auto injector 3 times a week and it seems to have helped my general feeling of well being. So good times.

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Garden followup

Jun. 3rd, 2013 | 02:22 pm

So, we spent a couple hours Sunday at the community plot. We removed some weeds, planted some seeds and talked to another of the people up there. This person is nice and understood our frustrations and also completely understood why we would decline the offer for the plot. He was in agreement with me that it was an indecent offer and that the woman in charge should never even have agreed to relay it to us.

I got a bunch of stuff done and I feel like it looks amazing and that if that can raise the price in connection to a sale then so be it. My entire body is sore like a MFer, but I feel accomplished and ready for the place to be done. I just want it sold, now!

Talked to the lady who raised her voice to me and she was all smiles and fake laughs. I felt like kicking her teeth in, but I can be fake with the best of them. It just shows her as the weakling she is.

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